Shameful Flies, Victoria's Secrets Models, Idiots

There was a time not long ago that I designated weekends for "day off from fishing". The idiots on the road from 6-9 AM on weekdays, move to the water on weekends. Given the choice what I'd rather have ruined by said idiots, I chose "the drive". And I'm trying to get back to that schedule. Weekends being dedicated if anything fishing, probably tying flies.

And so it was today, a day to catch up the "flies to tie" list. Only to think I'd reached the end and looking at the list, I forgot about the two Palmer flies on DRY HOOKS, and wrapping some conventional fishing jigs that are in a state of modification, with lead wire. List not completed.

Headline photo is the drying or finished fly organizing chain. To the purest fly tier, this is "The Chain of Shame". Those Squirmy Worms in the middle are the spin off of the San Juan worm. Pictured here in the worm box, if you'll count from the top left to the fourth and fifth worms, those are San Juan worms. A piece of chenille tied to a fly hook. Of the fly tying categories, feathers, fur, or synthetic material for the purest to not initiate action to revoke your fly tying card, chenille falls in the synthetic material category. But a few years ago, various rubbers began to be experimented with-the rubber worms above being the most life like rubber of all the rubbers. Fishermen-you know that any lure closer to life like in fact, has a short life. This rubber is so life like I've flopped a Squirmy Worm down unknowingly next to a real nightcrawler or red worm, and heard said real worms weeping with jealousy.

Keeping in mind that one of these realistic wonders only lasted one fish the other day, I thought about going back to the San Juan and just keeping track if the catch rates were near enough the same to justify not spending an hour or two at the fly tying bench after every Squirmy Worm adventure. But alas, as is the case with all things fishing, when something works you buy a life supply. And so, I may never tie a San Juan again, trying to deplete my supply of Squirmy material.

Other company on "The Chain of Shame"? The yellow jig was catching fish, even with a bare spot that appeared when wet. So I added another dyed duck feather to that. Fish didn't care about the bare spot. I did.

I mentioned in a previous blog that the fish didn't care that my Pat's Rubber Legs flies didn't have the figure of a Victoria's Secrets model strutting the runway. But I'd like to have a box of Victoria's Secrets models to take fishing, with me. So, I worked on those. Even varied the length of legs-like Vicoria's Secrets models!

Fittingly, just inches away from the "Chain of Shame", is a "Rack of Shame". In my Hareline Foaminizer fly tying system is a rack of Sharpies. Yeh...the high tech crayons. If I run out of various weights of tying thread of a certain color-usually shades of brown, or black-I pull the white spools of the appropriate weight and use a Sharpie to color those. Most effective if you stroke the thread stretched out from the bobbin and then rewind, but also effective just to go kindergarten and color the thread after wrapped.

Thought I was dead in the water today, when I began to tie the red worms. While there's many ways to tie a Squirmy Worm for durability and none are very durable, old guy like me and well respected fly tier Tim Flagler recommended making a dubbing noodle and wrapping under, and then over, the delicate Squirmy Worm material. Well, no red dubbing-or chenille. No red ultra heavy (to make up for no dubbing/chenille) thread. Yep, I looked around since the best deals on Sharpies are often packaged in groups. Didn't think I'd find it since I'm all about natural colors but there it was! An unused mild Magenta Sharpie! Did you know that light colored Sharpies will often come off several shades darker on thread, and "darker than what you want by the cap color", will often come off lighter, on thread? One look at this Magenta and I knew it would be close enough if not perfect, to replace the color of the non-existent red dubbing/chenille.

I leave at dawn tomorrow! Well, for a doctors appointment. And then a gripe session at the leasing office. Then...fishing! Geez...